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Using Conditioned Affirmations to Build Confidence with Women

by REd-xL

I'm going to explore a technique I developed myself from studying NLP and self-hypnosis a little while back...

The technique? Conditioned affirmations!

This is simply the method I use to keep my confidence level at an optimum high. Let me introduce some examples of how conditioning works so you get a better understanding of what I'm trying to explain:

The way in which I like to think about it is like biting my nails. I use to do this often, and the way I got over it was by telling myself not to bite my nails every time I started to or began thinking about doing so. I did this long enough until it was like a reflex. Now, I catch myself every time my fingers get close to my mouth.

Which brings me to my main point: confidence is conditioned in me so that anytime I feel the pangs of insecurity trying to make their way into my head, I find that I'm able to systematically cancel out any such thoughts.

The simplest way to explain it is by its name: "conditioned affirmations."

To put it simply: Anytime insecurity crept its way into my thoughts, I would tell myself the opposite; but that was never enough.

I figured out that when I did the opposite, as opposed to just affirming myself, that was the moment when my level of confidence began to rise with each action I took.

Here's an example:

Me: Hells yeah! It's time to go clubbing!

Insecurity: People are gonna laugh at you because you don't know how to dance. Girls are going to be soooo turned off. You have to wake up early tomorrow anyway; get some sleep. Girls don't want a guy like you, etc.

Me: I don't give a crap about what other people think. I'm going out to dance tonight for myself, and only myself. If I just happen to see a hot chick, there's no way she's going to be able to resist me. I'm going to have fun tonight, and nothing's going to stop me!

Insecurity: Damn...how bout best two out of three?

Me: GRRRRRRR!

Insecurity: Hey, why is my warning level going up?

Me: Just keep pushing it, buddy, and I'll block you.

So you can see it kind of works like AOL Instant Messenger where someone logs on to different names and harasses you, then all you need to do is block him and he's out of your affairs... temporarily. He's relentless, never giving up to grab a hold of your attention. All you need to figure out is how to click on that "Block" button in your head.

Guys like numerical steps, so here we go:

  1. Identify your insecurity. Think about how you're feeling. If not so swell, proceed on to step 2.
  2. Figure out what your insecurity is telling you. What's that little devil trying to convince you of this time?
  3. Tell yourself none of it is true and that you're feeling the opposite way. Hose down that little demon by telling it what's what and who the boss is. If you can shut him out, you've won.
  4. *The most important one*: Get out there and do what you just told yourself was going to happen.

It's enough to say something, but actions speak louder than words.

This is the step in which conditioning takes place: by going for the set objective, because it's daring, you receive a euphoric rush every time you do that daring thing. That rush feels GOOD, it's nearly a high (I'm sure we've all experienced that feeling throughout our lives). Because it feels good, your body will want to feel it again, so it will naturally go through the process by which it learned to feel good.

Once you've done this technique enough, that's when your body will naturally do all the mindset work for you.

I have been doing this for about 6 months now, and I've never felt down about myself since I started practicing this technique.

Good luck to all of you!

It barely takes any effort, and the effects are amazing.