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Nice Guys vs Jerks
I spent most of my years wondering, the same as a good number of nice guys out there. Why couldn't I get a girlfriend? What was it that made me not "sexy" or "appealing" I always had to ask myself. I had many other issues because I let so many people take advantage of me and my kindness. I became severely depressed for a while. And while talking with my friend, I asked myself "Why am I doing this for everyone else? What about me?" Within a week, I was starting to get in the door for some relationships, but it wasn't important to me. I was like, If they don't like me for me, than screw 'em. I became the jerk, and well I enjoyed it. Still didn't have a relationship or a woman, but it didn't matter. Nobody did. Chicks digged me, but again, I was too far to the extreme. I was arrogant and a bastard except when I got something _I_ wanted. But my calling is being a nice guy. After a couple years of this, I started falling back down. I didn't have many friends anymore, where as I used to have many. I wasn't feeling as good about myself anymore. Then, it happened. I determined that there isn't anything wrong with being the nice guy, or being a jerk. Just don't be extreme. I liked myself. There wasn't anything wrong with me. Sure, there were some things I had to improve, but I was well off with what I had. The arrogance I had developed became self-confidence instead. This helped me like you wouldn't imagine. What it comes down to is this: Women want many things in a man. Most of these differ from person to person, but some always remain constant in purpose while not in quantity. They want many things that a man wants. The first is to know that they don't have to take care of the man. That the man has the ability to take care of himself. A man wants this as well. I can't tell you how many men I hear complain everyday that their girlfriend or wife is always whining and worried and has no self esteem. I've experienced this many times myself. Along with this comes a sense of self confidence. It is important to the woman to know that she is on equal ground with you. She needs to know she can rely on you to make decisions, but also take responsibility for those decisions. Truth be known, in a lot of cases, it ends up being the man making a lot of decisions, but don't take that to mean they want dominance. I got slapped in the face on that one. They want to be worshipped as much as many guys do. And nice guys, don't kid yourself. Many nice guys want to pleasure a woman in life and in bed, but they also want something out of it. Many want them to stay with them or provide them with sex or both. Women want the same thing, but not at the cost of the person they are with. They want someone who will treat them the way they want to be treated without doing so at the cost of himself. When looking for a woman, look at what you want. That is most definitely (too some degree) what they want. Be confident. Be sweet but stand up for yourself. Just as men do, women have their own tests that they apply to every guy. When you make a bad decision, accept it. Don't LET the woman make all the decisions, make some yourself, but don't dominate her. The problem is finding out how to do each of these in moderation. Particularly when dealing with much younger or older women. Younger women (under 16-18) have a tendency to feel like they should be dominated. Older women (45+) have a tendency to feel like they should be worshipped. We're in a strange time now because women are becoming equals and they have mixed views of what that entails. They are learning, just as men are, what equality means.
Go back to the index
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Dating Questions Women Ask You and How to Answer! Laugh Your Way to a Great Sense of Humor How to Make Meeting Women Easy The Kiss Close - When, How, and What To Do How to Tell a Woman That You Like Her How to Eliminate Your Fear of Women The Little-Known Secret to Skyrocketing Your Success with Women
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