The Step-by-Step Guide to the Perfect Approach

by Sebastian Harris

Imagine you are taking a walk in the city.

The sun is shining. It’s a beautiful day. Or let’s say that it could be a beautiful day if you wouldn’t see so many beautiful women. It’s pure torture. You see one stunning girl after another and they all walk around in short dresses.

You would give everything to talk to one of these girls, to make her smile, and to take her out on a date.

But you are too afraid.

You can’t even remember the last time you approached a woman. Just the idea of approaching a woman makes you want to throw up. You don’t know how to stand, what to say, or when to ask her for her number. If you only knew these things, you would be way more confident.

Don’t you think it’s time to learn the steps of the perfect approach?

It is and the following infographic that was originally published on this post about conversation techniques reveals each and every step.

The Perfect Approach Infographic

But I want to make it as easy as possible for you to succeed. That’s why I decided to explain every single step in more detail. I really hope that the following step-by-step guide helps you to approach beautiful women and to get more phone numbers than your phone can store.

1. Overcome Approach Anxiety

Yes, you can approach thousands of women and desensitize yourself to the experience of talking to beautiful women. That can work. But there’s an easier way and it starts in your mind.

Most men are so afraid of approaching women that their mind produces one horror scenario after another. As a result, approaching women becomes a burden instead of an exciting experience.

What’s the solution? Change your focus. Instead of focusing on all the negative things that could happen, you focus on achieving your goals. Imagine how it would feel to kiss a beautiful woman at the end of the date. If you leave your house with this image in mind, you can’t lose.

2. Have Fun When You Go Out

What do most guys do when they go out to approach women?

They are determined to get a few numbers and they try to look as cool as possible. As a result, they look aggressive and way too serious.

That’s not how you get girls. Girls want to date fun guys who love to have a good time. They want a playful adventurer. And in order to become this fun and playful man, you need to realize that approaching gorgeous women is not different than approaching any other person.

3. Don’t Hesitate

Men who hesitate masturbate.

It makes me cringe when I go to a bar and I see a bunch of guys who are staring at a girl without doing anything. The only thing you have to do in such a situation is to walk up to her and say hi.

Not hesitating is the best way to set yourself apart from all the other men who stand there and don’t take action.

4. Be Friendly and Charming

Unfortunately, a lot of guys take the advice to be alpha a bit too far. They confuse being a strong leader with looking like an Uruk-hai from The Lord of The Rings. Sorry, but looking like a mass murderer is not a good idea, at least not when you want to get dates with beautiful women.

Instead of being as alpha as possible, you should test how it is to be as friendly as possible.

Think about it. The moment you approach a woman she doesn’t know whether you are a genuine man or a rapist. You are a complete stranger and being friendly helps her to become comfortable around you.

5. Give Her a Compliment

There are a lot of misconceptions about giving women compliments. And yes, while giving compliments in a needy way can backfire, giving them with confidence can be extremely attractive.

The problem that a lot of guys who avoid giving compliments have is that the women they talk to don’t know what they actually want. When you give her a compliment she knows what you want. This can save you a lot of time.

6. Connect With Her

Every man who wants to approach women should also know how to connect with them. Women want to feel something before they allow a man to seduce them and connection is what triggers these feelings.

But don’t worry. It’s not that hard to connect with women. It’s a simple three-step process.

  1. Share your hobbies and passion with her.
  2. Ask her about her hobbies and passion.
  3. Refer her hobbies and passion to yourself.

That’s how you connect with women.

7. Have a Natural Conversation

A natural conversation flows. There are no uncomfortable pauses and you don’t just switch the topic without a reason.

Keep these things in mind when you talk to women. Don’t just talk about a topic because you want to talk about it and don’t just ask for her number because you promised yourself to get it in less than five minutes.

Let the conversation flow.

8. Read Her Signs

Women are not evil. They want you to succeed. In case you’ve watched the movie Hitch, you know that no woman wakes up saying “God, I hope I don’t get swept off my feet today”.

When a woman likes you, she will let you know.

The only problem is that a lot of men are blind to the signals of women. Most men don’t even notice when a woman plays with her hair or bites her lips. I hope you are one of the few men who are aware of these signals.

9. Don’t Ask for Her Number

One of the biggest mistakes guys make is to ask for a girl’s number. Okay, asking is better than walking away with no phone number, but that doesn’t mean that there isn’t a more effective technique.

Don’t ask for her number. Demand her number.

Women are somehow conditioned to say no when a guy asks them for their number. She doesn’t feel the same pressure when you tell her to put her number into your phone. Say it with confidence and she will do it.

10. Enjoy Your First Date

Just keep your smartphone in your pocket and enjoy your date.

That’s all I have to say.