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Why You Shouldn't Wait for Signs of Interest

by Squirrels

There are many, many women out there who won't give you any encouragement, even if they want you.

So if you wait around for HER to give you a sign of interest, you may miss a lot of opportunities.

Most girls won't open kino, for example. You have to go ahead and touch them first... really start to warm them up before they counter with their own touching. If you get that early-on, consider yourself lucky and take full advantage.

Unless a girl is REALLY taken with you, she probably won't put forth any effort to further the relationship. She'll make opportunities but YOU have to capitalize on them.

This is a natural TEST. Women offer openings, but unless they are extremely attracted they do not actively pursue. This is the female nature -- receptiveness.

The chump who has no self-confidence will sit and wait for a sign of interest and, not receiving any, will hem and haw and wait aimlessly until his self-doubt overcomes him and he walks away.

Or she'll glance over at him, but she won't smile and instead just looks the other way. He'll read that as disinterest and go mope in the corner.

Or he'll be on a date with a girl and put his arm around her but she won't react at all... she won't snuggle closer, won't look at him, acts like it didn't even happen. And he'll assume she's not interested in him physically and back off.

But the truth is he NEVER GOT REJECTED. He rejected HIMSELF because he took her lack of reaction as disinterest.

This is what Gunwitch and others mean when they say, "Make the ho say no."

Remember... girls can't give go-ahead signs to just any guy, because if they did, they'd have EVERY guy out there wanting to bang them. And often they feel uncomfortable giving those signs even to the guys they WANT, because even THAT can be seen as "slutty", and they don't want to appear too interested all at once.

You ever been at a party or in a nightclub/bar and seen a guy just walk right up to a girl you were trying to work up the nerve to talk to... and start talking to her, putting his arm around her, etc, and she seemed to be unfazed by it... and chuckled to yourself about how the guy was an ass and was just being obnoxious and couldn't get any?

Then later that night you find her warming up to him, seeking HIM out, smiling, giving out her number, etc... and you wondered how she could POSSIBLY be taken in by his lame "routine"?

She was into him from the BEGINNING. During the proverbial "7 seconds", she had already decided that this guy made the first cut. From then on it was simply a test of his persistence, to see if he felt confident that he was the real deal or if he would be overtaken by his insecurities in response to her indifference and take off.

Too many guys make that first cut, but the hot girl he's talking to offers little in the way of encouragement. This is the "mirror-test". With no positive feedback, a man receives no indication of his self-worth from the woman, so he has to derive it for himself.

If he looks at himself and sees one who isn't worthy of the woman in front of him, then he will reject himself. He will wait for a sign of interest or encouragement and, receiving none, he will give up on a woman that he could have easily seduced. If he truly BELIEVES that he has what it takes to seduce the girl, he will persist until outright rejected.

This is what's "hard" about approaching, about revealing interest, and about escalating. This is what most guys have so much trouble with... taking control of their OWN lives when encouragement is not offered to them.

Do NOT ask, "Is she interested in me?" Find out.

Do NOT wait for a sign of interest. Assume she is interested.

Do NOT wait for the right moment. MAKE it.

If a lack of encouragement forces you to quit at something as simple as picking up a girl... what is she supposed to think you're going to do when REAL problems come up, when you go through the hardship of raising kids and providing for their well-being?

Act like you've got a pair. Don't rely on other people to create your self-esteem for you.