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How to Get Started Meeting and Dating Girls

Practice! Practice! Practice! Make It a Daily Ritual

by John

Working up the nerve to ask a woman out, to approach a complete stranger from across the room and begin easy banter is not easy. And furthermore, it doesn't happen overnight.

Learning the skills needed to appear off-the-cuff and unrehearsed does not happen overnight, and should not be approached as a "miracle pill" that will begin to work overnight. This is a long-term campaign, and for many of the more cripplingly shy on this list, it is something that needs to be a daily ritual.

If you want to eventually bench-press 200 pounds, you don't just read books by bodybuilders who can bench-press 200 pounds and then walk into a gym and do it. You'd be crushed! You might hurt yourself, and never want to touch weights again.

Similarly, you can't just walk away from these Don Juan sessions and walk up to the hottest chick in the bar and banter the night away, just because someone who's good at it told you it was easy.

You need to approach this skill (and it is a skill) as something you have to work towards. Start slow, go with things that don't make you run screaming in terror.

Assuming you don't live in a big city where this can be construed as a bad thing, start making more eye contact with members of the opposite sex. Give 'em a smile. For some of us, that may be rough enough initially. Start asking for the time (don't forget to leave your watch at home for this maneuver!), or find little ways to interact with people comfortably.

Develop your technique slowly and over time. All of this must seem spontaneous, and like most any other action that seems spontaneous, it must be endlessly rehearsed and refined!

Don't just get extroverted towards the opposite sex... learn to speak up more in conversations, learn the fine art of turning the conversation towards YOUR fields of interest. Just go out and dedicate yourself to being more outgoing every day. This will translate into your dealings with women you find specifically attractive. And it's all part of a package.

Don Juan-ing is not like riding a bike... you can forget it, you can get rusty if you don't do it for a while. But if you treat the art of macking the way you treat the art of bodybuilding, academic study, i.e. as a long-term project, you'll find the results to be not only natural and easy, but they'll result in less problems later.

If you learn a bunch of tag lines that will help you snag that certain someone NOW, but the behavior doesn't mesh with your actual personality, you'll have a lot of explaining to do later.

Unless your biological clock is ticking, let this develop slowly but daily. It's like meditation: there is no end point or destination to the extroverting of your personality; it's the enjoyment and constant refinement of the steps along the way that make it rewarding.