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  Next time you're too scared to approach do this..

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Author Topic:   Next time you're too scared to approach do this..
DonJoey

Master Don Juan
posted 08-07-2001 12:39 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for DonJoey     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Earlier this year, a workmate of mine and myself were talking about how we constantly bomb out of picking up women we like simply because we get to shyt scared to make the initial approach.
Then we talked about how much worse we feel for not doing and my mate coined the phrase during one of our conversations "Man, I feel so much like shyt I hit the steering wheel when i'm driving just thinking how stupid I am."
And that's something that struck me. Not approaching a girl actually feels worse than getting rejected. So I swore to myself that next time I was starting to scare myself into not speaking/approaching a girl I would remind myself not to "hit the steering wheel" either...i'd use it as my mantra to motivate myself to get rid of my fears and pressure myself into making an approach.
Just by saying that, I jog my memory to the feelings of angst of not picking up or at least trying....not making an effort is the act of a true loser. And I didnt want to be one.
Now whenever I start that churning in my stomach and LoserJoey starts trying to convince me to not do anything - I just think to myself "DOnt hit the steering wheel on this one." and I hear the words come out of my mouth..."Hi, my name's Joe, what's yours?"

[This message has been edited by DonJoey (edited 08-07-2001).]

IP: 203.110.135.193

Dj Chase

Master Don Juan
posted 08-07-2001 05:55 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dj Chase     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
this is a good post

IP: 66.81.37.248

DonJoey

Master Don Juan
posted 08-07-2001 10:55 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for DonJoey     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
let the world know.

IP: 203.110.135.193

tweeder

Master Don Juan
posted 08-07-2001 11:37 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for tweeder     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Excellent, excellent, excellent post. And you really couldn't have written this at a better time. I really needed to read this after tonight. A great looking girl came into work, and I kept catching her looking at me. Then she'd shyly smile and look away. Any other girl I would have gone for it, but she was so good looking that I became intimidated I guess. BIG DJ MISTAKE I MIGHT ADD. Now I'm kicking myself like crazy. Now I'll never know what I could of had. We should all follow DonJoey's advice. Thanks!!!

IP: 205.188.199.159

DonJoey

Master Don Juan
posted 08-08-2001 10:28 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for DonJoey     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Tweeder,

Now use that feeling you've got to motivate yourself to not do the same next time. Keep doing it until it becomes a natural feeling to you.

IP: 203.110.135.193

SupaManlova2G

Don Juan
posted 11-06-2001 11:47 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for SupaManlova2G     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by tweeder:
Excellent, excellent, excellent post. And you really couldn't have written this at a better time. I really needed to read this after tonight. A great looking girl came into work, and I kept catching her looking at me. Then she'd shyly smile and look away. Any other girl I would have gone for it, but she was so good looking that I became intimidated I guess. BIG DJ MISTAKE I MIGHT ADD. Now I'm kicking myself like crazy. Now I'll never know what I could of had. We should all follow DonJoey's advice. Thanks!!!

Its so good to know that I'am not the only one to make a mistake like that. That happened to me a while ago and still regret that day. What really pisses me off is that I did not know how to read signals from girls at that time. Even now, There is a girl in my school who stares at me for long periods of time. I even stared back at here and she started blushing. But something keeps holdin me back from talkin to here. On thing I found that some of us need to do is JUST RELAX!! Every girl isn't gonna like you. But you ca still have an attidude LIKE IT. Sometimes I got to litertly FORCE MYSELF to say hello to everyone. But let me tell you. When you start being nice all the time. Other people like being around you, Thus Attracting Girls. So JUST RELAX and be yourself!!

IP: 152.163.194.187

Bungo Pony

Master Don Juan
posted 11-07-2001 11:18 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Bungo Pony     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
This is what I always tell myself when I'm in this situation:

"Go do it, or you won't get anywhere with her. Do it now before it's too late!"

------------------
Hey little girl, I wanna be your boyfriend - Ramones

IP: 205.200.67.18

Giovanni69

Don Juan
posted 05-27-2002 11:04 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Giovanni69     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
IS NOW OR NEVER YOU ARE RIGHT, JUST DO IT!!!!
i guess u have to start laying the first brick to end up whit a great wall

IP: 67.34.208.169

BMW

Don Juan
posted 11-12-2002 09:41 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for BMW     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
" Not approaching a girl actually feels worse than getting rejected"

GOOD POINT!

IP: 208.58.101.220

Buck Naked

Don Juan
posted 11-16-2002 04:36 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Buck Naked     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I like this girl "Megan", she's really pretty but when i see her in the library by herself I can't go near her. She's the shyer type but I've said hi to her b4 and she has said hi back. In the last 3 months I've all ready had three dreams with her in them. Some of her bestfriends are in my classes. She was even in one of my classes last semester. I'm at the end of the rope and don't know what to do. Any advise?

IP: 140.190.66.4

affirmed

Master Don Juan
posted 11-16-2002 10:02 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for affirmed     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
forget her. oneitis is extremely unhealthy!

IP: 195.92.168.166

Buck Naked

Don Juan
posted 11-17-2002 05:25 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Buck Naked     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
In regards to my post. It's hard to just give on someone until you actually done something about it. But for some reason I can't do it, I need someone to kick me in the ass when the time comes. Does anyone else have any advise? All responses are welcome.

IP: 140.190.66.4

SlyDonJuan

Don Juan
posted 11-17-2002 10:47 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for SlyDonJuan     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
It's easier said than done here.

Basically, you can tell yourself to be more assertive and grab your balls to approach her but nothing works if the confidence is not built into you.!

So how do you get the confidence which you have wanted all these while? It seems that I am not good in confidence and need to boost my self esteem.

IP: 161.142.162.28

killerasp

Master Don Juan
posted 11-18-2002 01:38 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for killerasp     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I feel the same way. i feel better if i get rejected from a hot girl than if i didnt talk to her. at least i tried and didnt work out, too bad, it wasnt meant to be, move onto the next girl.

IP: 128.230.169.48

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