Welcome - I am glad you are here.

Since 1998, SoSuave has been offering only the best tips on how to meet, date and attract incredible women. If this is your first visit I would suggest you start here.



  Don Juan Discussion Forum
  Don Juan Tips
  Self Confidence

Post New Topic  Post A Reply
profile | register | preferences | faq | search

UBBFriend: Email This Page to Someone! next newest topic | next oldest topic
Author Topic:   Self Confidence
chicago#1

Master Don Juan
posted 02-06-2002 04:34 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for chicago#1     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Here are some of my own thoughts on Self Confidence.

How many things do we all do that are way more risky then approaching a woman, chatting her up, and getting her number??

I came to this realization recently at work. I am a shop steward, meaning that I am always having to stand up to management on a daily basis. It is sorta high stress, and the personal risks are pretty high; I have to keep myself and others from getting in trouble at work, and I get criticized by co-workers and especially management; it is a leadership role with all the demands that implies. The other day I had to lay it on the line with the main manager. He totally backed down. I was feeling pretty good about that.

I work with the public, and about 5 minutes later this woman came in, whom I have always been curious about and who is very attractive. Then I thought: it makes no sense that I can be on one hand be screwing with the people in charge at work, but shy away from something as simple as asking for a number, even from someone who is super-attractive. I was feeling so confident that I was able to skip over most of the small talk (we already have a kind of rapport) and just ask her if she wanted to go out. She said yes and then gave me her work number.

Sh*t, that was so easy, and I wouldn't have cared if she had said no. Then I thought; how many people do things, like make major investments, compete in sports (esp martial arts), have dangerous jobs, all of which are risky, but can't ask a woman out? Putting in this perspective changed my whole attitude in seconds! And now I have a potentially hot first date as a reward (I'll find out in 4 or 5 days )

IP: 216.162.193.91

Turbobird

Master Don Juan
posted 02-06-2002 04:50 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Turbobird     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Nice worked, Chicago#1! ...But I would suggest that you go for the home phone # in the future. And that you don�t ask her for a date while getting the #. Tell her on the phone 3-5 days later.

/Turbobird

IP: 213.67.36.128

chicago#1

Master Don Juan
posted 02-06-2002 05:12 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for chicago#1     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hopefully, this will clarify--I didn't make plans with her then; is that what you mean??

IP: 216.162.193.91

sosuave.com

Administrator
posted 02-06-2002 06:00 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for sosuave.com     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Tips forum.

IP: 24.25.68.217

Turbobird

Master Don Juan
posted 02-06-2002 06:13 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Turbobird     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by chicago#1:
Hopefully, this will clarify--I didn't make plans with her then; is that what you mean??

That was not what I meant! I just have the opinion that it is better to ask for the home phone number and to wait asking her for a date until you make the phone call some days later. That�s my opinion, but that doesn�t make it the truth. You have to make your own decisions.

Of course you should date her! Some mistakes (or maybe you handled it just right) doesn�t mean that you should give up. Just always think about what you can make different the next time.

I hope you understand what I�m trying to tell you.

/Turbobird

IP: 213.67.36.128

Rebel Leader

Master Don Juan
posted 02-11-2002 02:08 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Rebel Leader     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
This is a very important tip, chicago. When a person identifies success in one place, like success on the job, he understands how he combined his feelings with events to create that success. If he transfers that knowledge of himself to the dating game, it will seem like more familiar territory. He'll know what emotions to expect and when, like anxiety or adrenaline rushes, and won't be overwhelmed by them.

I think it would be helpful to post a series of examples that link together familiar successful behaviors to dating behaviors. It would reduce the intimidation factor of dating by making it as commonplace as going to work.

------------------
Live ... Love ... Laugh

IP: 12.75.101.191

Vegas Playa

Don Juan
posted 05-23-2002 04:40 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Vegas Playa     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Just got done watching David Blaine's
"Vertigo" special, and I thought of this post.

Though David Blaine willingly exposes himself to these feats of endurance and faces his fears through these stunts he does, I wonder how much ballz he has when it comes to approaching women.

I heard him on Howard Stern this morning talking about how women like Fiona Apple and Angie Everheart are "friends" of his, and it sounded a bit AFCish.

Just a thought, but wouldn't it be funny is he was an AFC, in spite of his fearlessness in other aspects of his life?

IP: 172.147.20.214

All times are ET (US)

next newest topic | next oldest topic

Administrative Options: Close Topic | Archive/Move | Delete Topic
Post New Topic  Post A Reply
Hop to:

Contact Us | The Don Juan Center

Powered by Infopop www.infopop.com © 2000
Ultimate Bulletin Board 5.45b