How to Touch a Woman Like a Man

by Hector Castillo

Telling women what you want, what you stand for, and how you feel about them is the essence of game.

But at an even more fundamental level, an interaction between a man and a woman is about doing (each other).

I do enjoy being blatant with my interest in women. I tell them what I think of them and let them know that I’m very rough, aggressive, and passionate. But while I’m talking, and sometimes even instead of talking, I prefer to save myself thousands of words and just grab her ass.

What could you say to a girl that is more clear than that?

Not much.

So here’s a bunch of ways that you can touch her, from open to close, and let her know that she’s dealing with a man who isn’t afraid to treat her like a woman.

Opening During the Day

If you’re going to touch a girl on the open, you need to be bold with your words. Direct openers only.

As you approach her on the street, walk beside her, lightly tap her on the elbow, then take a step back and lean back to defuse some tension. Then, after she looks at you, tell her something you find attractive about her — I usually tell women they’re adorable, sexy, or I compliment their ass.

If you approach her in a coffee shop, bookstore, or any other daytime venue, and she is already close to you, a simple tap on the lower back or elbow will trump anything and everything you could say.

Opening at a Club or Bar

As a girl walks past you, reach out and put your hand on her stomach and then pull it back as she turns to you, then say hi or compliment her. If you’re more experienced and ballsy, keep your hand there or move it to her waist and then pull her in.

If you approach her from behind, touch the small of her back, then step to her side while keeping your hand on her back or wrap it around her waist.

Coming from behind her or from the side, lightly grab her hand or arm (or above the elbow if you’re feeling bold). Lean back slightly as she turns, then cock your head to the side, smile devilishly, then be bold with your words.

As she walks your way, extend your arm as if she were coming in for a hug and then say something like “hey there!” or “hey sweetie!” While out with a student of mine, I noticed a girl walking towards me. I smiled, extended my left arm, and greeted her with a “hello sweetie!” like I was her boyfriend. She fell into my arms, leaned her head on my chest, and looked up at me with doe eyes. I’d never met her before. Her actual boyfriend got pretty upset when he saw this and moped to the bar.

If she passes by you, say hi, and offer your hand like you were asking her to dance, then pull her close when she accepts.

Or, my absolute favorite, just walk up to her side, grab her waist with one hand, squeeze gently, and then say “hi there.”

All of this touchiness should carry over into the actual conversation as well. Hopefully after you open her, you continue to touch her, or, even better, hold her close as you talk. As the interaction continues, touch a girl as much as she’s comfortable with. The more the better.

Walking Around with Her During the Day

Whenever you make a point or get to the juicy part of a story, touch her waist and elbow. Doubly so if she’s doing it back or she’s initiating touch (and if women aren’t frequently touching you in conversation, you’re doing something wrong).

When crossing intersections with her, grab her hand and lead her across the street. If she continues to hold on past the intersection, then interlock your fingers and walk around like a couple.

As I walk with a girl, I like to blatantly check a girl out, compliment her ass, and give her a light tap on the bum (and if we’re really feeling each other, I’ll squeeze it hard). Almost every time I slap a girl’s ass, she’ll give me a shocked but turned on face or laugh and tell me I’m ridiculous.

At a Bar or Club — Or on the Street During Nightlife Hours

I hold girls close the entire time we talk. Arm wrapped around her waist, with occasional brushes of your thumb on the small of her back. If you can “lock-in” by positioning your back to a table, wall, column, or sitting down on a chair, this is much easier. Most girls will naturally cozy up against your chest if you’re locked in.

When girls are being extra sweet, qualifying themselves, or complimenting me, I like to lightly massage the back of her neck, play with her hair, and then pull her in to kiss her.

As you hold her, slide your hands from her waist to her thigh and graze her ass as you pass. If she responds warmly, lay your hands on her ass, as if it were the most natural thing in the world. If she starts flirting heavily, leaning in, or looking at you like a piece of meat, squeeze her ass like a stress-toy.

I enjoy picking women up in an air-missionary position, holding them by their ass and wrapping her legs around my waist. Usually we make-out in this position as she dry humps me in the air. And if I’m at a house party or walking around with her on the street, I’ll even pick her up and sling her over my shoulder like a fresh kill.

If you’re sitting down, lightly pull her into your lap or have her straddle you. Do this if she’s hovering over you and leaning in a lot (or if you’ve already made-out or groped each other).

For the Win

You’re ready to take her home, behind the bar, or in a bush and give her the dick?

Grab her hand and start walking.

Or if you prefer to close verbally, touch her as you do.

Grab her ass, and smack it lightly and whisper in her hear, “let’s get out of here.”

She’ll get the message that she’ll soon be screaming how much better you are than her boyfriend as you drive her pelvis into the floorboards and leave her walking with a limp for a few days.

About the Author: Hector Castillo is a writer and assistant editor at He specializes in college campus game, "Big Man on Campus" game, and the sexual direct style. is the web's highest traffic men's dating advice site, on the Internet since 2008. For more from Hector and the Girls Chase team, visit You can contact Hector at