Some Common Mistakes Men Make When Talking to Women
Common Conversation Mistakes, Awkward Silences, and Some Techniques to Improve Your Flirting
I had a chance to interview Bobby Rio, creator of Conversation Escalation: Make Small Talk Sexy.
Since the topic of the program is creating more fun, flirtatious, and "sexual" conversations with women, I figured I'd get some tips out of him for improving your conversation skills and creating attraction in women.
1) What Are the Major Mistakes Men Make When Talking to Women?
It's funny... because when you finally figure this out, you'll look back and see that there were just a handful of tweaks you needed to make... and these tweaks vary from guy to guy.
Some guys spend too much time trying to appear "cool" to a woman, and wind up coming across as stiff and boring. For these guys, they need to learn how to inject some fun and playfulness into their conversations.
Some guys tend to get stuck at a "friendly" level. These guys need to learn how to spot when there is "too much" rapport happening. Attraction is a balancing act between "tension" and "comfort." And a lot of the guys who get stuck at a friendly level are so afraid of the "tension" that they spend way too much time building rapport thinking it will make the woman like them. — And it will... as a FRIEND.
Some guys have no clue what to say to a woman. These guys need to learn how to spot the hooks a woman is giving them. Every time a woman opens her mouth and says something it should be triggering three or four things you can say back. The problem a lot of these guys face (and I suffered this for YEARS) is that they spend too much time in their own head trying to think of what to say next. A woman will give you all the material you need. You've just got to learn to spot it.
But the biggest mistake most men are making is that their conversations are one dimensional and flat. This is because they don't have enough "weapons" in their arsenal.
Maybe they are comfortable at telling stories... so that's all they do. Or maybe they spend the entire time asking questions. Or maybe they are funny — so they rely too much on humor.
The fact is, you need to always have about five techniques you can "whip out" to keep the conversation flowing and EXCITING. A conversation should be like a rollercoaster — where the woman doesn't know what twist and turn will come next.
2) How Do You Avoid Awkward Silences and Running Out of Things to Say?
Ah… my biggest fear.
For me, I was more afraid of the awkwardness of having nothing left to say, than I ever was of rejection. In fact, if a woman openly rejected me, I could take it. What I couldn't take was standing there not knowing if I should keep talking to her, or give up. I hated thinking the woman was just being polite and really wished I would leave.
But here is thing...
The easiest way to completely eliminate awkwardness is to acknowledge it in a humorous way.
By calling out the "elephant in the room" and saying what you're both thinking... it demonstrates that you are socially intelligent. And social intelligence is EXTREMELY attractive to a woman.
It's sort of like if you've ever had a girl turn her cheek when you went for the kiss. The worst thing to do is pretend it didn't happen. Because the both of you know you tried to kiss her, so you're not fooling anyone by acting "cool" about it.
Just say (in a mocking ‘announcer type' voice) "And she slips him the cheek". This sort of humorous response will put you both back at ease.
Women fear awkwardness even more than men do... so by showing a woman you have enough social intelligence not to let things get awkward... you become a lot more attractive in her eyes.
3) Tell Me About Conversation Escalation. What are Some of the Important Concepts and Techniques You Cover?
Well, my goal with this program is to show you how to get your mind to explode with things to talk about, so that you feel more confident, natural, and relaxed when standing in front of a beautiful woman.
Now, in order to get you to that point, you're going to have to learn a few things. And these are probably things you've never heard before... because most of the "gurus" like to avoid the subject of "small talk."
In this program we are going to show you how to "steer" a conversation along. How to spot the "hooks" a woman is giving you. You'll learn how to "bait" a woman into asking you about things you want to talk about.
You're also going to learn how to inject "sexuality" into a conversation. Because ultimately, you can have an hour long amazing conversation with a woman, but if you don't get her thinking about you in a "sexual" way — it will be impossible to ever kiss her.
Now there are a ton of techniques you're going to learn that almost force you to become a more attractive talker. But more important than the techniques, I'm going to teach you a "specific" practice routine... so that this new way of communicating comes natural to you, and you remember to use the information when it counts — when you're talking to a woman.
The one thing I want to leave you with is: No matter how intimidated you are by the thought of becoming a "smooth talker" with women... you really are a lot closer than you think.
Once you make a handful of "tweaks" you'll find that you actually enjoy talking to women — and will begin to see how easy it is to create attraction.
To become a master at talking to and flirting with women, check out the very popular Conversation Escalation: Make Small Talk Sexy and learn how to instantly generate attraction through the way you talk to women.