Alternatives to Bars for Meeting Women
While you may not look desperate in a bar, you sound as if you would feel uncomfortable there, maybe even awkward. That would make it almost impossible for you to appear confident and, if you read some of the articles on this site, you'll realize confidence is what attracts women.
The library may not be the ideal location for you either, and I'll tell you why. Most people who go to libraries go there because they have work to do... a research project for school, gathering statistics for work... whatever it is, interruptions from strange men are not compatible with their project and almost certainly unwelcome.
But take heart... you're on the right track, you've just got the wrong train.
There are two other alternatives that would serve your purpose better. Try either a museum or one of those bookstore/coffee shop combination establishments that seem to be popping up all over the place.
Museums are great places for meeting women. Often you'll find women in museums who either wouldn't be caught dead in a bar period, or at the very least wouldn't go to a bar without at least two girlfriends for backup. But, they will go to a museum alone.
You'll find approaching a woman in a museum is much less daunting than approaching the same woman in a bar.
To begin with, she's there with an open mind. She's looking for intellectual challenge (more on this in a moment). If nothing else, you already have a commonality upon which you can build a relationship... you both go to museums! You also have in common the exhibit at which she is looking when you decide to make your move.
This is where the intellectual challenge comes in and where I deliver to you a word of warning... You're hunting big game here.
This is no ordinary bar-bimbo you've zeroed in on and she comes equipped with her own set of natural defenses you must first neutralize in order to overcome the objective.
But, these defenses can be breached as long as she remains unaware that it is your intention to do so. Caution and subtlety are your watchwords.
Follow her through the museum in a manner that leaves her unaware of your presence. When the two of you finally end up looking at the same statue or painting at the same time, it should appear as mere coincidence.
So much for the caution part... you've done that successfully. Now the trick is to be subtle.
Let's say, for example, you're looking at a Rembrandt. Don't look at her. Remain "captivated" by the painting. Speak to her in a manner that almost seems as if you're thinking out loud, but clearly your remark is directed to her.
"Fascinating, isn't it? You know, I've seen this piece in several books, but it's so much more powerful in person, don't you think?" Now you look at her. The rest is up to you.
The same can be said for those bookstore/coffeehouse places. You don't need to be as cautious, but chances are you'll be talking to an introvert. Her brain is screaming...
"If all I wanted to do is read this damn book, I'd do it at home. I need human contact! Somebody please talk to me!"
But like a frightened animal, she'll take flight if you're too aggressive. Just be subtle. Look at her book first and make a comment about the story or the author.
She'll talk to you... that's what she's there for, whether she knows it or not.