Why You Must Be Bold With Women

by Jerry

This tip is a general principle you should keep in mind with women. I'll explain the principle, then give one example of how it works.

The principle:

Raise your risk and lower her risk.

As the man courting the women, it is up to you to put yourself at risk from her and reduce the amount of risk that she may be in from you.

Why? Because by taking these risks upon yourself you prove to her that you have her best interests at heart, not your own selfish interests, and hence that you will protect and look after her.

You raise your risk by increasing your exposure (i.e., being bold). Ever wondered why women yell and scream over male strippers? It isn't so much their bodies as the fact that the strippers are putting themselves "out there" (i.e., taking social risks).

Now think about what scares women, which is the opposite kind of behavior - being followed, being secretly watched, men with hidden ulterior motives. All men that are concealing and guarding themselves whilst gathering information on her (increasing her risk, decreasing their own). Dishonesty, concealment, artifice, these things repulse women.

Courage, audacity, boldness, and risk taking attract women.

Now here's the example.

You see a woman around and make eye contact, maybe exchange a smile.

Here's a very wrong thing to do (you should know this if you read this site, but I'll explain better why it's wrong).

You send her flowers anonymously. This has increased her sense of risk to herself (someone out there she doesn't know who has the hots for her!), whilst not putting yourself on the line at all.

Contrast this with its opposite. You walk up to her and somehow, anyhow (even if it's clumsy) you introduce yourself, telling her your full name and what you're doing around here (in complete truth). You hand her your card and you leave (you'll come back in a few days time to see how she reacts to you - if good, you'll continue).

The card is vital. I'll tell you why in a moment.

What if you're at school and don't have a business card? Well, join student politics or get on the organizing committee of some club or organization - anything that has an official logo. Get the card printed up with your full name, work or organization physical address (not PO Box), your home address and your home telephone number. You could also put a URL for your homepage which will have your basic resume.

Now think what you've done. You have basically handed her an insurance policy against yourself! If you turn out to be trouble, she has this hard-to-fake card that could only have come from you that she can call in backup against you at your work/organization or home life.

You've put yourself at risk. Because she has this official information on you, she can check it up to see if your are who you say you are.

The card ISN'T to get her to call you! It's to put yourself at risk and, hence, lower hers. She feels safer around you, she has backup, she feels more trusting in you and confident in her own ability to engage with you.

She's less worried that you'll turn out to be a weirdo because, if you are, she knows where you live and can get help. She can't do this if you're hiding your identity and addresses - and if you're hiding that, then, she thinks, what have you got to hide unless you actually are dangerous?

This principle is very broad. You can apply it to almost all aspects of dating and relationships. Increase your own risk, decrease hers. NEVER decrease your own risk whilst raising hers.

This is what being a man is all about.