How Much Effort Is She Investing Into Your Relationship?

by Tomer

How many times have you heard a guy saying...

"I don't understand... I did everything right... I did this and that... and she is dumping me or is flaking on me. I'm nervous, heart broken and suffering."

The solution to this problem can be described by the following formula:

Let S be the amount of suffering you endure in a relationship.

Let E1 be the amount of effort you are putting into the relationship (i.e. coming up with ideas for going out, making reservations, buying stuff, and generally doing things to make her happy).

Let E2 be the amount of effort she puts into the relationship (same as above only she doing it to you).

Then, my law says that:


Meaning that the amount of suffering you endure in the relationship is equal to the difference between how much effort you invest and how much effort she invests in the relationship.

For example, if you run around all the time making sure she is happy and trying to organize things for the two of you to do, etc, while she idly stands by, your S will be high and most likely you will suffer quite a bit.

I have been burnt like this big time and have learnt my lesson.

So the next time you are dating a girl you really like, keep in mind this golden law and always keep your S to a minimum by making E1=E2.

Note: you don't want it negative, cause then you will just end up dumping her.