Do Women Want You to Make Passes at Them?

by Reese Witherfork

The other day I heard a radio ad for an online dating service; I found it to be quite absurd. The announcer said, "Ladies, are you tired of being hit on by all the Rico Suave men who hang out at the nightclubs? Avoid these men by trying online dating!"

Why was that ad absurd? Because women - even attractive women - are almost never hit on by men.

Here's what usually happens at a nightclub: you hang around with your girlfriends, some guy in the bar is clearly checking you out, you wait for him to approach you ... and wait ... and wait ... and it just never happens. Oh, sure, he'll walk past you about a hundred times, looking you up and down ... but as for actually approaching you and speaking to you ... it very rarely happens.

If you have the balls to approach a woman and make it clear that you're interested in her, I can tell you right now that she will be flattered and she'll give you a fair shot. She's not going to think you're a jerk for being so forward. Quite the opposite; your confidence and candor will be greatly appreciated and, as long as you have a sense of humor and a smile on your face, she is sure to find you at least a little charming, no matter how ugly you are.

Here are a few, quick tips:

a) Let her know right away that you're actually interested in her. Speaking at length with her about the kind of music the band is playing doesn't tell her that you're interested in her - it tells her that you're interested in the band. But saying "Do you have a boyfriend?" will grab her attention instantly. Trust me.

b) Just flatter the heck out of her. Go ahead and lie; it doesn't matter. Every woman on Earth likes to be flattered.

c) If she genuinely seems disinterested, back off. Don't waste your time with a cold fish.

d) Try not to be too self conscious. You're a man. There are things you want and things you need. Don't be embarrassed about it. There's nothing wrong with needing a little action now and then.

e) Let the woman save a bit of face. If you mack her up in front of 20 strangers, she might feel a little awkward about handing over her phone number. She'll worry about looking cheap. Don't get me wrong: go ahead and lavish the woman with attention - just be somewhat discreet about it. It'll greatly improve your chances.

Reese Witherfork