Applying the 80-20 Rule with Women

by Ron Louis & David Copeland

This week we are going to discuss the 80-20 rule. This rule is important because it says that you get 80% of your positive results from 20% of your actions. Put another way, 20% of the things you do with women give you 80% of your results with women.

Put yet ANOTHER way (don't worry, we have plenty of ways left), you could say that 80% of what you do with women only produces 20% of your positive results with them.

This is important - it means that 80% of your effort is basically wasted, returning almost no results with women!

Here at Louis and Copeland labs, we are dedicated to finding that 20% of actions you can take that reliably produce the 80% of your positive results. The testimonials for our products, and the emails we get every day from men who are having success with women, often for the first time, indicates that we have succeeded.

While almost all men focus on the wrong actions with women - that is, they do the 80% of work that gives them 20% of their positive results - men in different situations tend to focus on the different "wrong things." Let's take a look at those wrong things, and the few 20% things they could do to be exponentially more effective:


Men who are "Nice guys" and "Just Friends" with women.

These men feel guilty when they approach a woman, worry about hurting women, and always seem to end up "just friends" with women.

The 80% of activities these men do that gets 20% (or less) of their positive results with women:

  • They worry about upsetting women.
  • They beat up on themselves for not being more romantic with women.
  • They worry a lot about appearing "safe" to women.
  • They try to control interactions with women and "make things go well."
  • They try learning seduction techniques they will never have the nerve to use, anyway.

The 20% of things they could do that would make 80% of the difference with women:

  • Heal their underlying issues of guilt about desiring women.
  • Get a new definition of respect for women that allows them to show sexual interest in women.
  • Learn to let go of being controlling and have some curiosity with women.

To get more help with this, look at:

Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome


These are men who have opportunities to talk to women, but don't have the nerve or know what to say to convey their romantic interest.

Men who have a hard time talking to women spend 80% of their time doing the wrong things:

  • They beat up on themselves because they think it will help (it doesn't).
  • They take bad advice like "just be yourself."
  • They look for a "Opening Line" that will magically make them succeed with women.
  • They look for ways to control women, and their interactions with women.
  • They mistakenly think they can quickly learn how to meet women on the street and get them in bed in 20 minutes or less, when in reality they can't even say "hi" to women without their voices cracking.

The 20% they could focus on that would make 80% the difference:

  • They could learn conversational structures that allow for spontaneity and curiosity.
  • They could learn simple flirting skills and opening moves.
  • They could practice, one step at at time.
  • They could celebrate their victories, one step at a time.

To get more help on this issue, check out:

How to Talk to Women


These are men who need a "Complete Overhaul." They are men who have little contact with women, or are coming out of a relationship, or for other reasons have no "dating structure" in their lives.

The 80% of activities these men do that gets 20% (or less) of their positive results with women:

  • Having no structure or support to help them.
  • Letting problems stop them (being busy, having kids, etc).
  • Going at it alone.
  • Trying one thing (for instance, asking married friends to set them up) then giving up when that doesn't solve all their problems.
  • Looking for quick fixes.
  • Not celebrating their successes unless they get laid.

The 20% they could do that would give them 80% of their positive results:

  • They could get support that is actually supportive, helpful and consistent.
  • They could get structures in place to help their dating program keep moving forward.
  • They could play the numbers game.
  • They could learn realistic, quality tools for finding niches and interacting romantically with women at those niches.

For more help on this issue, check out:

The Mastery Program


These are men who feel "Stuck", "Unsuccessful, and "Not free" when they interact with women. These men want to feel free with women, but don't. They want to have a breakthrough that will allow them to effortlessly show their romantic interest in women.

They want to be able to let out the romantic, playful, fun parts of themselves with women, but who just can't seem to be able to do it.

The 80% of actions they try that give only 20% of the positive results:

  • Trying to be "honest and sincere" with women.
  • Making dumb "confessions." Telling a woman about your love of porn, for instance, won't make her like you better, no matter how sincerely you offer it.
  • Offering to give women things they don't want to give.
  • Offering to do things for women they don't want to do.
  • Trying to control women and how interactions with women go.
  • Trying to get "slick" enough with women to be able to win their approval, and thus (hopefully) get laid.
  • Trying to use logic with women, explaining why they think a relationship and sex would be a good idea and hoping the woman will say yes (she won't).
  • Trying to entertain women.
  • Taking the useless advice of friends who don't know more than you do.

The 20% they could do that would give them 80% of their results:

  • These men need an experience of freedom with women. They need a substantial, real-life experience of using technique, support and the letting go of concerns that will allow them real joy with women. This can happen quickly, but it must happen to really feel free.

At this point, the only place we know where you can get that quickly and powerfully is at our:

Freedom with Women Seminar

Whatever you do, start asking yourself, "What is the 20% I do with women that gives me 80% of my positive results?" Concentrate on those actions, and your success rate will improve.

Best of luck!

About the Author: Ron and David are dating coaches. Their book How to Succeed With Women has sold over 40,000 copies. They have been featured in magazines such as Cosmopolitan, Playboy, YM, Maxim, GQ UK, Swank, Gallery, and Players. They have also been on the Rosanne Barr Show, the Issac Hays show, To Tell the Truth, Fox News, CNN, UPN, and ABC. For more great tips on meeting and dating women or to ask a question go to