How to Fill Your Life with Women

by Ron Louis & David Copeland

Question: I often see a woman on the street, and I feel like, "I wish I could go talk to her." What is the answer? How can I go talk to her and seduce her?

Answer: If you are thinking "I wish I could go talk to her" when you see a hot woman in a public place, it's a sign that you are not taking advantage of the easy places to meet women in your life.

The thought "I wish I could go talk to her" is the result of a life where you have eliminated all reasonable opportunities to meet women. Therefore the unreasonable, most-difficult opportunities — while on the street, while she's running for a cab — are the only ones that pop up. You end up thinking that the solution is to get good at handling the only opportunities you see - the near-impossible ones. It's not.

You only moan about not being able to meet women "on the street" when you are NOT meeting women in all the places that you should meet them - social networks, niches, classes, and by being generally involved in your life. Moaning about wanting to meet women on the street is a SYMPTOM of needing to do the basic work of meeting women.

Because you are not doing what you should do to meet women, but you still desire women, you start fantasizing about seducing women you see on the street. This leads you either:

  1. to beat up on yourself for not being able to miraculously seduce those least-available of all women, or
  2. to start falling for miraculous quick fix claims that say they can teach you to get those women in twenty minutes or less.

We've said it a million times, but it's still true: if you don't have your life set up so that meeting women is automatic and easy, all the quick-fix claims in the world won't do anything but separate you from the money in your wallet.

  • If you aren't joining and visiting clubs and teams, you are going to end up longing for women you can't get, who are the most difficult to talk to and seduce.
  • If you aren't saying "yes" to social invitations and developing social groups, you are going to end up alone and horny, wishing you could have sex with the hot barista at the coffee shop you frequent.
  • If you aren't participating in activities and classes, you are going to start moaning about how you wish you could talk to some woman you see on the street somewhere.
  • If you are not doing online dating, then you'll spend your life staring at a woman on the bus and dreaming about how great it would be to be able to walk up to her and seduce her.

Unless you are willing to have balls of absolute, inhuman steel (which you aren't) and unless you are willing to develop a set of scams and routines (which you also probably aren't), then stop thinking the answer is to learn to approach a supermodel who is running for a cab! It's not!

Thinking "I wish I could talk to her" is NOT a sign that you need to learn how to approach strangers in public, where every hot woman is angered by or terrified of new men talking to her.

Thinking "I wish I could talk to her" IS a sign you need to GET A LIFE.

There is no magic phrase or perfect opening line that can take the place of getting a life!

Actually, though, this is good news. "Getting a life" will make you increasingly happy and effective and connected with women in a meaningful way.

This year, consider making this New Year's resolution: Let go of trying to learn scams that don't work, and which make you feel bad about yourself. Stop wanting to be a manipulative jerk, and learn how to make real connections with women — even if those connections are just for short-term sexual relationships.

We've had many students whose lives have become significantly happier in every respect by taking on getting a life, rather than wishing they could instantly seduce hot women on the street. One man says "Since I took up Salsa dancing, and really got into the community, it's been natural for me to meet, flirt around with, and even bed really hot women. That has made it much easier to talk with women everywhere else, too." This could be you.

Oh, and here's a bonus: When you have a life that puts lots of women in front of you, and gives you reason to talk to them, approaching women in public becomes significantly easier.

When you have a connected, active social life, you will find yourself becoming the kind of person who naturally talks to strangers, and to whom strangers naturally talk. You won't have to work on it happening — you'll simply find that it happens, when you have a life with women that juices you up.

Put another way, the ability to "approach any woman" is a result of having developed a life that is rich in social opportunities that put you in front of women already. Once you have that, approaching women in public will just be part of what you naturally do.

Try this right now: Just for this moment, get off your own back about needing to learn how to approach and seduce "any woman, any time, any place." Allow it to be okay that you might never be good at approaching supermodels who are running for a cab, for instance.

At the same time, allow it to be possible that you might have more sexual abundance with hot women than you ever thought possible. Allow yourself to relax into the idea that you can have what you want with women, even if you aren't the Perfect Seducer in every situation.

Then take some steps, today, to develop more social connections with people.

Best of luck!

About the Author: Ron and David are dating coaches. Their book How to Succeed With Women has sold over 40,000 copies. They have been featured in magazines such as Cosmopolitan, Playboy, YM, Maxim, GQ UK, Swank, Gallery, and Players. They have also been on the Rosanne Barr Show, the Issac Hays show, To Tell the Truth, Fox News, CNN, UPN, and ABC. For more great tips on meeting and dating women or to ask a question go to